Personal Oral Hygiene
Helping people clean and keep their teeth since 1961!
Personal Oral Hygiene
Helping people clean and keep their teeth since 1961!
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When Knights Were Bold-4 continued
A hush fell over the crowd as a group of knights rode onto the field in somber black armor, with a dirge of muffled drums, towing a horse drawn hearse painted in the colors of the school of Oral Surgery. The drums quit and the only sound was the hiss of nitrous oxide, the gurgle of pentathol, and the bang-bang of the engine driven impactor, like a battering ram of old, as it unceasingly battered at the teeth in their bony crypts. It would not be denied that inevitably a tooth would end up on the ever increasing pile in the hearse. These knights were girdled with forceps of every shape and description, also elevators and chisels that would make marble melt like butter.
At this point, Squire Eugene Lewis, sitting on the ground by Fuller, told him the story of his friend, Squire Ercell Miller, who was visiting the surgery department of his alma mater, and had been quietly observing a young student who was laboriously trying to remove a lower first molar. After hanging on it for thirty minutes and only succeeding in sweating out his gown and breaking off the labial plate of enamel, he noticed the dentist observing him and asked if he had any suggestions. The dentist said, "Son, if you will just quit now, I can still save that tooth." The banner on the hearse read:
Someday, Why Not Now?
The last group on the field now appeared wearing the colors of the full denture society. They seemed the happiest and most prosperous group to appear. As they charged across the field the snapping of artificial teeth filled the air; there were flat cusps, inverted cusps, and all shapes and fashions of teeth. The Swisse denture float was so pretty that it made you feel sorry you had natural teeth, because then you wouldn’t need to have them removed to have the benefits of beauty and personality these teeth could bestow on you.( At least that’s what the sign said. ) However, the crowd noticed the fact that some of the advocates themselves hadn’t taken advantage of the many improvements that they so generously offered. Their banner proclaimed:
Laugh, Drink, and Be Merry.
Our Dentures Can’t Be Beat,
If You Don’t Mind The Clatter
And Don’t Really Try To Eat.
The tournament day was over for another year and amid the arguments as to who had perfected the best weapons to go forth and slay the dragon of dental disease during the coming year, the crowd prepared to go home.
The knights on their magnificent stallions and in coats of armor, with their followers congratulating them and the little squires, like Fuller, mounted their burros and started out, a little dazzled by the show.
As Fuller wended his way home across hill and dale, he found himself riding side by side with an old grey haired squire mounted on a burro like his. He struck up a conversation by asking the grizzled veteran what he thought about the day of the tournament and the old man slowly replied, "I have been coming to these tournaments for thirty years and every year they are the same. The horses get better, the armor more shiny, and the weapons more numerous and deadly. But it is disappointing to see another year go by with the dragon devouring its victims at an increasing rate." Fuller queried, "Do you think the dragon is so terrible and unconquerable as everybody seems to think?" The old man answered, "Well, it is rumored that the dragon was brought to bay years ago by a squire in a little hamlet, who merely taught his patients to keep the dragon out of their mouths." He chuckled as he continued, "Contrary to what we believe, the dragon was so small you couldn’t see him without looking through a ground piece of glass, and none of our weapons were small enough to impale him. But by this time the day of the tournament had proved to be so much entertainment that nobody paid any attention to the little squire with the ground glass, hence they never see the dragon. He has grown in their imagination to such a huge, fierce, terrible, fire-breathing monster that they have lost their taste for battle. Anyhow, the tournament day is Tax Exempt, and is something to look forward to."
<The End>
