Personal Oral Hygiene
Helping people clean and keep their teeth since 1961!
Personal Oral Hygiene
Helping people clean and keep their teeth since 1961!
|
|
|
When Knights Were Bold-3 continued
With Manual Dexterity and Rubber
Dams
And Forsaking All Other Goals
We Are Determined To Place Pretty
Fillings
In That Damned Dragon’s "Little
Holes".
Still blinking and rubbing their eyes, the crowd was perplexed at the appearance of the next group wearing the colors of the school of Full Mouth Reconstruction (jokingly referred to as the ear-to-ear coverage boys). They moved onto the field slowly and looked like giant gold replicas of the various crowns of teeth in the dental arch. There were fat molars that could hardly make headway, jaunty bicuspids, tall and Spartan looking cuspids, and slender incisors. As they reached the center of the field it suddenly dawned on the crowd that underneath the gold armor plate of these massive teeth were knights mounted on their stallions, with windows of plastic and porcelain on the front so they could see where they were going. T h e y were arguing about whose gingival margin came closest to the ground, and the ones that plowed a furrow were disqualified. The crowd was still a bit confused as this group slowly moved off the field. Their banner read:
Tho We May Appear As Cowards
And We Look An Awful Sight
We Challenge That Damned Dragon
To Come In and Take A Bite
The next attraction on the field was a group of knights that bristled like porcupines with hundred of knives, scalpels, curettes probes, scalers, and root planers. Their saddle bags were filled with toothbrushes of every description, some two-row with hard bristles, three-row with soft bristles, odd shaped handles and some even combined hard and soft bristles. These brushes were almost crowded out of the saddlebags by toothpicks (both plastic and wood were advocated). Some of the toothbrush handles had little rubber snouts on them that looked like an anteater’s head. These knights were wearing the colors of the school of Periodontia, and their armor stood out by the dripping bloodstains on it. Some of the knights juggled night guards, and others twirled periodontal pack material up over their heads in such a manner that would make the most adept pizza maker lay down his dough in shame. They left the field leaving behind the atmosphere of the village butcher shop, and the banner that carried their motto gradually disappeared from view.
With The Knife, Curette and Scaler
By The Knowledge That We Know
You May Lose Your Teeth Tomorrow
Today Your Gums Must Go
Pouring through the archway now and flooding onto the field came knights wearing the colors of the school of practice management. The air was filled with the hum of high speed calculators and the clatter of adding machines running up astronomical figures. One knight flung "buck sheets" into the air so the breeze could carry them over the crowd. The demonstrations of time and motion would make a sleight-of-hand artist like Houdini, appear as an arthritic turtle trying to catch a hummingbird by comparison. (Incidentally, most of these time and motion enthusiasts have had at least One heart attack and are hunting a faster way to bring on another.) One knight was loudly proclaiming the disasters that be-set us in "Creeping Overhead." He bemoaned the fact that paper neck towels for patients had increased in price one-fourth of one cent in the last six years, and that this tremendous increase in over-head would wreck us financially. With the last "buck sheets" slowly floating to the ground, and the knights riding off the field, I couldn’t help wondering what their goal was, and what they were trying to prove, when I read on their banner:
We Want Profits Up and Overhead
Down
With Efficiency We Are Seething
The Only Thing That Slows Us Down
Is The Patient Insists On Breathing.
